I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
There was a lot of him and a little penis
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
