WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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