yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
