if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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