can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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