I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
