How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
