Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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