So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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