Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
