Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
