Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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