I only kidnapped one of them. chill
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
