Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
You pole danced in your parka.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
