Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
A bitchslap is in order.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
