this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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