addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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