glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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