4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
