She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i just had sex bonerless
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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