the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
