I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
