And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
