is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
