Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
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