Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
