Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
