When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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