Yo dont text me then not text me
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
