My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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