where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
