I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
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