Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
