I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
