So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize