You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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