so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
