I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
