he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize