she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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