I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
