she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize