I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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