It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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