Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize