Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
