TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
