I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
