Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
