i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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