The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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