handjob tips. give me some.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Randomize